Welcome Dialog-Listening

How can I communicate effectively to have a happier marriage?
Let’s look at how the Marriage Mirror process works.

Marital research dispels all doubt: couples that communicate effectively consistently report greater marital satisfaction. These couples are healthier, happier, positively influence other couples, and consequently may possibly live longer.

The main flow of the Marriage Mirror is to work through three sections (Listening, Speaking, and Environment – about 2 hours each) with similar steps for each section (and time – days or weeks – between each section to work your Action Plans):

  1. Listening Section – focus your attention on the development of specific listening skills
    1. Your Self-Assessment (10 min): How you feel you are listening to your partner. Assessment of Partner: how you feel your partner is listening to you.
      Then Your Partner’s Self and Partner Assessment: (10 min) Your partner does the same.
      Remember: Each marriage partner does both the Self and Partner Assessments.
    2. Reviews (45 min)- Together, after you both complete your self and assessment of partner, then you unlock the Marriage Mirror Review step. This is when you prepare using the Discussion Guide together, then you will click through and review your self and partner answers side-by-side and discuss the similarities and differences and areas for growth and encouragement.
    3. Action Plans (45 min)- When you are done with your reviews you unlock the Action Plans and you step right into reviewing the questions and inputting the answers together, to take notes of encouragement and areas to work on. This step is key to turn your new Marriage Mirror Review reflections into productive, life-changing experiences.
    4. On Your Own (A few days to three weeks) – Do the good work! Now you can take three days, or two weeks (whatever works for you) in between the Listening and Speaking sections to work on your Listening Action Plans. Review your answers, find quiet times to discuss progress and challenges, and don’t forget to use the Feedback Cards – “Catch me doing something good!” and “Caught you doing something good!”.

Couples with poor communication are often caught in a vicious cycle where poor communication contributes to marital dissatisfaction, which in turn further hinders the ability to successfully communicate. The cycle, when not corrected, continues to degrade the relationship.

Effective communication is not a natural skill and often we are unaware of the behaviors that hinder us. The Marriage Mirror identifies your “blind spots” by showing you the things you are doing well and reinforcing them while pinpointing behavior that can be improved and showing you how to change it.

At each step, you and your partner will have the ability to develop a Shared Action Plan that will lead you through a proven process to communication success.

Access to the Marriage Mirror will be yours for an entire year providing an opportunity for you to retake the Mirror, reinforce your learning, and be encouraged by your progress.

As you conduct your own experience with the Marriage Mirror, it is our prayer that you will enjoy the process and the positive results. 

Art Robertson, Ph.D.,  Marriage Mirror